05:45:17 am on
Saturday 13 Jul 2024

LED Bellybuttons
Matt Seinberg

My friend Mike and I were driving to a business lunch the other day, and we always manage to talk about some funny things. I was telling him how I changed many light bulbs in my house to LED from CFL. When we redid the kitchen, we did LED high hats as well.

From there, he started telling me once again about his dating life. Mike is, after all a serial dater. He was telling me how some women he dated had belly button rings. I'm of the opinion that women over the age of forty shouldn't bother with that stuff, it's really for the younger set.

Then we started getting silly. How about having an LED bellybutton light that points down to the fun parts? Just imagine you're in a dark room, and there's a little glow from this light showing Mike the way to paradise. This was there's no fumbling and missing the good parts of the willing female participant.

As I'm an old married man, I have no use for this stuff. Mike is an old single fellow, so stuff like this will easily entertain him. Maybe this is an idea we can take on "The Shark Tank" and have someone invest in so we can make millions selling LED Bellybutton Lites on the Internet. Remember, greed is good.

I can just see Mark Cuban shaking his head, putting his hand on his forehead and saying, "I'm out." The strategic partner should be Lori Greiner, the Queen of QVC. She can sell anything. I'd love to see Lori actually demonstrate the LED Bellybutton Lite. She is after all a very attractive blonde-haired woman, with a great body. I think she would really rock the lite.

Say the power goes out, late at night. All the batteries in the flashlights are dead, too. Pop a LED Bellybutton Lite on and you're good to go! You could even put one on your forehead to see where you're going. All it takes to turn it on and off is a little push.

Matt Seinberg lives on Long Island, a few minutes east of New York City. He looks at everything around him and notices much. Somewhat less cynical than dyed in the wool New Yorkers, Seinberg believes those who don't see what he does like reading about what he sees and what it means to him. Seinberg columns revel in the silly little things of life and laughter as well as much well-directed anger at inept, foolish public officials. Mostly, Seinberg writes for those who laugh easily at their own foibles as well as those of others.

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