Self Rules Love
M Alan Roberts

If our parents had never taught us how to walk, we would have learned how on our own. Its our instinct. There is a true nature born with every individual human - and every other animal as well. If left alone, our true natures would have continued to evolve. However, as we aged, our parents, teachers, friends and other people around us felt compelled to try to shape us. They wanted to control our actions. They wanted to mold us into what they wished they would have become. It wasn't that they were necessarily malicious with their intentions; it was just that they were trying to live vicariously through us.

That pissed us all off. It created a world of confusion for us to have to deal with. Torn between doing what we thought would earn us the respect of others, and being true to ourselves, our lives continued to sway back and forth in ineffectiveness. We were like small saplings blowing in the wind. We wanted to form strong stalks. We wanted to lead our lives guided by our strong cores. But the thoughts, opinions and demands of all of those around us left us in conflict. And periodically, we began to fail ourselves.

The external influences that contaminate our existences create cases of mistaken identity amongst us. Unless we directly intervene, those identities will become so ingrained in us that they become our perceived realities. In those instances, there will still be the true nature of the individual lying deep under the surface. That is the source of confusion. Brainwashed from birth, we lose track of, or never even develop, our internal fortitude. With no strength on the inside, our lives become weak manifestations that serve absolutely nothing save to misrepresent us.

As we continue to spiral downward in life, those who once tried to shape us get old, die off, quit caring and otherwise are no longer involved. And so were stagnated in inefficiency alone. And many times, we become greatly depressed. We cannot understand or even discern the answers to what locks us in our confused prisons. Unknown to others, inside of ourselves, we are at constant war. We are filled misery, sorrow and an unbelievable longing for what we could have, what we know we should have, been.

So many people lack an internal balance. There is no harmony within them. They go through their days forcing smiles and doing their best to perform their social and professional responsibilities - and so many of them are right on the verge of suicide. When they're alone, undisturbed and not distracted, they ask themselves about their reasons to even continue going on. They know that today is just one more day in what seems like a never-ending accumulation of unfairness. But they don't want to be quitters. They don't want to go out like that. They want people to understand who they really are. They want to be valued for what they truly represent on the inside. They want to escape their maddening imprisonment.

And they can quite simply if they choose to.

Escaping the prisons of misrepresentation and misunderstanding comes solely in the form of self appreciation. As individuals, we have to learn to value ourselves even if were elderly and have never done so before. It is of profound importance. The source of human suffering stems from the fact that we do not represent ourselves with integrity. We represent our jobs. We represent our families. We honour our husbands and wives. We sacrifice for our children. But we always give ourselves the short end of the stick. We always eat shit so that others can smell the roses.

And that needs to stop for all of us immediately.

Our learned dysfunction is the very cause of our suffering. Through time, we begin to use this dysfunction as a crutch something that gives us a reason to continually fail. The negativity of this attitude self perpetuates and continues to grow deeper and deeper until it is a hole that is impossible to climb out of. We go through our lives feeling compelled to fix what we believe needs repaired, yet the truth is that there is nothing actually broken.

Begin today to focus on the three qualities of appreciation. Regardless of anything, never betray your dreams and your goals. Regardless of anything, never make judgments about yourself and never pay attention to the judgments of others that are directed at you. And regardless of anything, take any negativity in your life and turn it around. It is not acceptable for you to be sad. It is not acceptable for you to live in a state of depression. This is your life. This is your day. Grasp it and firmly control it. Place your concentrations on appreciating yourself first in this life and begin to experience the unbelievable power that was naturally given to you at birth.