Saturday 22 Oct 2016

Our Connected World
Matt Seinberg

No matter where we go today, someone somewhere is probably trying to find us or call us. There is no escape, no matter where we go.

Our cell phones are the main culprits. Many have built in GPS trackers that parents use to know where their kids are, or suspicious spouses use to find their errant significant others.

I know too many people that use their phones all the time, whether it’s for actually making a phone call, surfing the internet or playing games. When you’re at work, playing games can be distracting.

Recently I mentioned that I bought an iTouch, and I can’t believe the amount of things that this little device does. It’s a basic iPhone without the phone, which is how I explained it to my friend Steve in Florida.

When I brought it to work with me, I found myself quite distracted by it. In a certain part of the building, I can pick up a good WiFi signal so I can check email, or a current Scrabble game I may be playing. Those things than actually take up a good amount of time. I found that my production at work was suffering, so I didn’t bring it every day.

There are some kewl apps for the iTouch, including AOL Instant Messenger, Yahoo Instant Messenger and Skype video chat. I only have two people on my Skype list, now, my cousin Abby in Oregon, who has yet to approve me as her friend, and Steve in Florida.

I’ve known Steve since our high school days. We lost touch after graduation, and found each other about 6 years ago on MySpace. I went to a group that had my high school in it. I saw this bald, bearded man with the name of someone I knew way back when. I wonder if it’s the same person; I didn’t put in a request.

The next day, I get a friend request from Steve. Turns out it was him and we’ve been pals ever since. Now come the fun part.

This past Wednesday, I’m getting ready for work, and I’m running late. I take one last look at the iTouch, and see a message that Steve wants to chat on Skype. I figure he’s in his home office ready to begin his day, (t’s almost 9 AM, so I accept.

Holy moly, I’m sorry I did. Steve is still in bed, and he asks me if I just got up! Steve, put on a shirt, you hairy beast, before you video chat!

Now, if he did this for his girl friend that would be fine. If a good-looking topless woman wanted to Skype me that’s fine, but not a hairy topless middle-aged man. I quickly explained that I was running late and had to get ready for work, so we talked for about thirty seconds and signed off.

This just proved to me that no matter what time it, where we are or what we’re doing, someone wants to talk to us. My uncle in Oregon recently told me that if I wanted to call him at 11 pm EST, I could since it’s only 8 PM there. At that time of night, all I want to do is go to bed.

All I ask, please, please, please put on some clothes if you want to video chat. Give some warning about what you’re wearing or doing. That is unless Jennifer Love Hewitt calls. She could be nude or clothed and I wouldn’t care. Heck, I’d be happy that she called at all.

Matt Seinberg lives on Long Island, a few minutes east of New York City. He looks at everything around him and notices much. Somewhat less cynical than dyed in the wool New Yorkers, Seinberg believes those who don't see what he does like reading about what he sees and what it means to him. Seinberg columns revel in the silly little things of life and laughter as well as much well-directed anger at inept, foolish public officials. Mostly, Seinberg writes for those who laugh easily at their own foibles as well as those of others.

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