Wednesday 07 Dec 2016

Party of ???
Jennifer Flaten

All right, I have a very important question. You need to answer truthfully.

Would you buy diapers, formula or baby clothes endorsed or designed by an unemployed, unwed mother of 14?

Hmm, having a hard time deciding?

Okay, here's a little more information about the designer, 8 out of her 14 children were born at one time. All her children are the result of invitro procedures and there is a chance that this mother maybe a little, oh, what's the word....unbalanced.

Oh and did I mention that the mother, and I use that term very loosely, is better known as "Octo-Mom"?

Yes, Octo-Mom mother of fourteen small children, eight of which are brand new babies, some still in the hospital may soon have a product line of baby related items.

Honestly, in what weird world would anyone buy a product with the Octo-mom seal of approval?

I cannot fathom why any company out there would touch that proposition with a 10' pole.

Yet, I have to believe someone has approached her with this idea since she is patenting or trade marking (whatever the hell you do with names) the phrase Octo-mom.

It goes without saying that she will get a TV show.

I know, I am beating a horse that is clearly very dead, but who the bloody hell will watch a show about this woman?

Unfortunately, I have the sneaking suspicion that if she does get a show, it will be wildly popular. I imagine that tons of people will tune in; she is so revolting and creepy that people are just compelled to watch.

People will tune in to see if she goes nuts, or to see if they can glimpse what she is really like, as if that is possible on a "reality program".

Of course, big family shows are all the rage right now. You can't swing a cat without hitting a show with a title that advertises plus 8, or table for 12 or 18 and counting.

You know, at first I was confused, I thought 18 and counting was a reference to the number of minutes you could stand to watch the show without going insane not the number of children that the couple had, my bad.

Ah, I remember when the TV show party of 5 was a big hit.

True, the show was a fictionalized soap opera about five kids whose parents died leaving the kids to fend for themselves, but you have to admit if the show was on now, it would have to be Party of 15 to get anyone's attention.

I mean no disrespect to big families. How large you want your family is really your business.

I just wonder about people who not only have a large family but also find it necessary to be on a TV show about said large family. Wasn't the attention you received at the grocery store enough? Apparently, it wasn't enough for the "stars" of the aforementioned programs.

In a completely "well duh" moment I saw an interview with a member of one of the large family reality show couples.

He was explaining that no one could understand what it is like to have the TV cameras on you all the time, how stressful that is and how you never get a moment's rest-blah, blah, blah.

Well, gee you could send them away at anytime. You could give up all the money and fame. It's not like they are forcing you. What a moron.

I also have no clue why the average bear finds this type of program so engrossing.

Until a few, okay more then a few, years ago most people came from large families.

Large families were in fact the norm; you were unlucky if you had a small family.

I haven't had the opportunity to speak an older person who comes from a large family to see what they think of this new "reality show" craze about large families.

Something tells me the members of the older large family generation have no clue why anyone would want to watch the day-to-day goings on of a large family.

My suspicion is that most parents do so little actual parenting and interacting with their own children that watching a large family being itself is fascinating.

I might be the only person who doesn't find it fascinating. Let's face it; they get along just like all the rest of us do...except they do it on a much larger scale. So what.

Although, I did read in the paper that some backlash to these large family reality shows is brewing.

Which doesn't surprise me someone, somewhere is always willing to get their knickers in a twist about something it might as well be big family TV.

I want to know, is the pendulum going to swing, as it so often does in television. Are we going to see programs about little families?

Imagine the hushed voice over-"How do they do it. Only two parents and they have 1 child. Coming soon to FamTV a riveting hour of family drama, watch a mom taking one kid to the store, one kid clothes shopping and making one kid dinner. How does she do it? Will she make it the whole day? Tune in tonight at 9CST to see".

Personally, I can't wait for party of three!

Jennifer Flaten lives where the local delicacy is fried cheese, Wisconsin. She writes about family life, its amusing or not so amusing moments. "At least it's not another article on global warming," she says. Jennifer bakes a mean banana bread and admits an unusual attraction to balloon animals and cup cakes. Busy preparing for the zombie apocalypse, she stills finds time to write "As I See It," her witty, too often true column. "My urge to write," says Jennifer, "is driven by my love of cupcakes, with sprinkles on top. Who wouldn't write for cupcakes, with sprinkles," she wonders.

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