Sunday 25 Sep 2016

Hockey Mom
Jennifer Flaten

For the record, I don't care what kind of mom you are, except if you are a bad mom that matters to me. If you are a bad mom, I want to know about it so I can keep my kids away from your kids.

Otherwise, Hockey mom, Soccer Mom, Stay at Home Mom, Working Mom it really makes no difference to me.

Truthfully, I can barely remember if you are little Johnnies mom, let alone remember if you are a stay at home mom soccer mom, who gave up the daily working mom rat race, so that you could be better connected to little Johnnie and frankly, I don't care.

Now I understand labeling things is a just human nature. Some labels are inevitable like sex, height, weight that kind of stuff. Others tags serve no purpose except to make people feel special.

This need to be special is also human nature. Unfortunately, some people take it to extreme. I see no problem in innocuous labels like pet lover or NASCAR fan.

It is the crazy labels like world's best hockey mom, or stay at home superior to working mom that I make me cringe. I also, admit to getting really irritated with women who are constantly proclaiming their "identity."

Besides, isn't it tiring to run around brandishing your status as a working, hockey mom while juggling your Starbucks and Blackberry?

You know what I think about women who spend their time proclaiming their momness to the world? I think they are unhappy with who they are, not to mention the fact, that they crave attention.

Whether the attention is good or bad, these gals are out there lapping it up. I can just envision this woman back in high school, where they dramatically announced that they were converting to a Gothic or Druid Vegetarian just to see what everyone would do.

Instead of quietly going about their business, they have to proclaim loudly and longingly that they are moms, but not just any old mom, a (insert descriptive phrase here) mom.

What is the most galling is that they spend so much time talking about how they are the best kind of mom out there. You can spot them at kids events, clustered together making snide remarks about all the other types of moms.

Instead of lending support or trying to understand other moms, they trash other women that are not like them. Because according to them, if you are not their "kind" then you are less then perfect.

This is just another way women perpetuate the cliquish mean girl's attitude of high school out in the real world. This undying need to make themselves better then the next woman by running her down, which I believe is a big factor in people feeling uncomfortable with women in positions of power.

I'm not saying it is right to feel that way, but Queen Bee's have a habit of ostracizing people who don't agree with them. And who wants to deal with that?

What does a hockey mom have that a soccer mom doesn't? Furthermore, why should anyone or I care?

Do men sit around and describe themselves in such asinine terms? No. They are men, with jobs (or without as the case maybe). Most men, if pressed will describe themselves as dads, but that takes second or even third place to their other interests/careers.

When men do say they are dads, they say they are dads, just dads. They feel no need to add that they are hockey dads or Girl Scout dads.

If all women would stop labeling themselves then maybe, we can put an end to one of the biggest battles that women wage against one another. I speak of the working mom versus the stay-at-home mom war.

This battle rages on to this very day, with each side claiming smugly to be better then the other. To both sides I say "Stop the Madness" No one cares about your working status except you!

If you stay at home with the kids, you don't need to justify that to anyone. If you work outside the home (which is a stupid phrase that needs to go away) then get over your guilt and stop trying to make it sound like you are a better person then the women who stay at home.

Therefore, until women stop the labeling madness, people will still fear a woman being in power. They figure it will be just like the lunchroom, with only the cool kids admitted into her club.

Look out if you are on her not the It list. Then you will be subjected to getting you books knocked out of your hand and your lunch tray pushed into your chest.

Jennifer Flaten lives where the local delicacy is fried cheese, Wisconsin. She writes about family life, its amusing or not so amusing moments. "At least it's not another article on global warming," she says. Jennifer bakes a mean banana bread and admits an unusual attraction to balloon animals and cup cakes. Busy preparing for the zombie apocalypse, she stills finds time to write "As I See It," her witty, too often true column. "My urge to write," says Jennifer, "is driven by my love of cupcakes, with sprinkles on top. Who wouldn't write for cupcakes, with sprinkles," she wonders.

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